Mamma Talk

While driving to school yesterday, my two kids asked if I could open the huge bag of skittles that I’d stowed in Julia’s backpack to donate to the Halloween goody bag. Why not? They could each take a small pack out and put in their lunch. Goodies are goodies, right? Wrong! I was scolded when I picked up yesterday. No “thank you” – just an angry teacher’s aide who gave me back the bag saying I didn’t have enough – there are 22 kids in the class. Ok, I’ll admit that was careless on my part, the bag held 20 packs. Then she said with a stinging accusation, “The bag must be sealed!”

Immediately I felt inadequate. Then, I paused to address the silliness of the incident. Why do I need to give them a sealed bag of tiny sealed bags? Is a mommy likely to inject poison into tiny sealed packs of skittles?

You know what, with all I’m juggling I’m bound to drop a few eggs – let that be the worst thing I do!

mamma sonia

wow – hearing those words the other day made my life

My little one is actually starting her third school (if you count two daycares). We are all lucky b/c a good friend of hers from her last daycare is in her new class at the new school. I see this week that she is branching out a bit. This morning she said, “there’s my best friend!” I said, “Oh! What’s her name?” “I don’t know!” she said. She and the little girl stood staring at each other – making eyes at each other, I should say.

And there you have it, friends. I moved so much growing up that my long-standing friends date back to high school. I’m so envious of people that have friends from when they were little. Lord knows that Facebook has done an incredible job of finding these old friends. I know a few people that have had elementary reunions.

In fact, the age of Facebooks brings people of all ages to the toddlerish act of asking to be friends. If someone refuses you or, worse yet, un-friends you, it’s a new level of rude, right? Well, now people can also say, “Who cares? I have ninety-five other friends no matter how shallow they are!!”

My daughter was hanging this toy clock she has and she said, “What time do you get home from work?” and I said, “4:15″ and she said, “Ok, then that’s what time I’m going to leave on the clock.”

These flowers have no business blooming in the early fall!! But, I’m feeling a bit nostalgic. Alas, no time for nonsense! I’ve got lunches to make, kids to dress, forms to sign, checks to write. OMG I’m already behind, seriously. Wishing you all luck getting back to the routine.

At least my daughter does… She bit the pediatrician yesterday thwarting an immunization attempt. When you work it’s really not funny to ask for more time off to get to the dr. to try again.

Ok, your son or daughter will eventually reach teenager city, hopefully unscathed, where there will be a whole new playing field for them and us as parents. I know there are several approaches to this time where our kids are invinceable and we are scared stiff. Here is one of them: “You can’t do anything I haven’t already done” or “I have done it all so you can’t get anything over on me.” Now, I’m not judging but I can only glance back at my own adolescence with a wince. And, I’ll tell you, my mother was pretty wild. She was really beautiful, travelled cross-country alone and owned a Harley. She was also a beautician and a personal shopper at Saks Fifth in Manhattan and ended up your typical soccer mom dodging a bunch of life’s balls with a bunch of balls. She would tell me her crazy stories and I wanted nothing else but to outdo her. And, outdo her I did.

I’m not doing it. In fact, I’m not saying anything until they are thirty. As far as they’ll know, I was a little girl who wanted good grades and praise. Hopefully, my friends from high school won’t blow my cover. I have also heard that you can’t hold them too tightly or face questions, etc., with a flat out “no”. “You are not allowed to drink alcohol” for example. Well, that’s a pie in the sky approach that won’t work and even worse cause the kid to do it behind your back and never tell.

My boss and I were talking about this recently and I have to credit him with a very wise opinion. He said that if his kids came out and asked him what he did as a teenager (let’s say they were already in a bit of trouble) he would answer, “It doesn’t matter what I did. You and I have completely different circumstances and so you cannot compare yourself to me.” Interesting and true. You see, my life post-parental-divorce was bad. My mother, still the renegade, and I often didn’t know where we’d live next and to you readers, “I’ve done it all so you can’t get anything over on me.”

So, here are two lovely girls attending Catholic school in Westchester, NY. They cannot compare their lives to mine in any way and therefore don’t need to be astonished at my crazy behavior as a teenager.

So, here is a story that has me so shocked I can’t stop thinking about it. A family friend has a teenage daughter who is 16 and a son who is in his first year of college. These are really normal, working, middle-class people living just like (I take the liberty to say) you and I. He goes to his daughter’s bedroom one night to say goodnight and what does he find? Her and her boyfriend doing the unimaginable on her bed. Whoa!!!! And the son, on probation at college was just arrested for having pot in his car.

What are these people doing wrong??? what kind of parenting are they subscribing to??? I need to know!! Because, I can judge all I want but somehow, with the will of my entire existence, my train will end up at a different station than theirs.

Give me your thoughts – what works and what doesn’t??

Mamma Sonia

I took coffee to work today in a sippy cup!

ah, it’s been a while and there are always bends in the road. I’m sorry to say I might be at another but isn’t life like that?

“I would love to live like a river flows, carried by the surprise of its own unfolding.”
— John O’Donohue

At any rate – back to the kids. So, I’ve been shaving my legs for quite some time. I don’t know what it is with this razor but I cut myself every time. The kids spot it b/c it’s on the back of my leg. One day they both approach me, “Mommy, there is this cream that you can use to shave your legs so you don’t cut yourself.” They call me in the next time the commercial airs, “Mommy – this is it!” it’s Nair. “And,” says the little one, “It comes with a sponge!”

Actually THEY are the sponge for advertising – without knowing what money really is (yikes!)